In response to the comments on the last entry....

My comments were getting long,(see here) so I turned them into another post...

(To Patrick....)
"You are probably right...
So, since I will probably never find a man like that, I should just settle for one of these guys... Should I settle for Jeff, the married one who looks like a relatively dumpy, bald english professor?(Although I like Jeff a lot, I can't even imagine myself in bed with him... that is a big red flag in my book....)
How about the one who used his steak knife to pick his teeth the other night at dinner (That would be Paul #2, actually the best one out of the bunch, I think - at least he can hold an intelligent conversation)... or Andy, the skinny long haired truck driver who wears nothing but t-shirts, plaid flannel shirts, ratty jeans and hiking boots....? These are the only types of men to choose from in Hick County...LOL
When I was with R, I always felt like I was the mother, and I was the only responsible adult in the family... and he's 10 years older than me!! I just want someone that feels intelligent and caring enough that I can trust him...

~~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~~
BTW...

My son's Dr.'s appt. the other day ended up being a long day... they sent him for an EEG, and an MRI... ever try to get an ADHD 6 year old to lay perfectly still in an MRI machine before??? For 20 minutes??? Not an easy task.... They did give him some medicine to help the ADHD, though... It seems to be helping some...

The place is crawling with 'em.....

I have these friends, Alan and Rhonda. Every time they invite me over they have a new single guy for me to meet. Alan works in the agricultural field, so they are always guys who work in the same field, very tough hard working guys...
Last Friday night, it was Andy. Nice, sort of quiet, kinda cute...He is a truck driver, hauls grain. Saturday night it was Paul (another Paul, go figure...) He's a big, burly, teddy bear sort of guy... he works at the local farmer's co-op. I really liked both of them... Hard as I try to cover it up, I still have that Kansas farm girl spirit that I was born into...LOL... I love men who are rough around the edges like these guys....
Seems I have men coming out of the woodwork now, but none of them seem quite right... none of them are Hawk - they all get compared to Hawk, and come up lacking.... *sigh*.
Oh well, men like him are once in a lifetime matches...
Anyway, Rhonda has suggested that she and Alan and Paul and I go out for dinner or something soon... should be fun...

From bad to worse....

Why do things always go from bad to worse in my life???
The school called me at work yesterday. (During a big President of the company inspection tour, I might add...) They told me to come get my 6 year old because he was totally uncontrolable and they were tired of dealing with him. So I took today off to stay with him, tomorrow he will stay with my daughter, and Friday I take him to the pediatric neurologist, (school recommended) to see if they can find anything wrong with him. There is virtually no day care in this town, a few women who do it in their homes, most of which I wouldn't let dog-sit for me... much less watch my son... No one to watch him once my daughter moves... and she turns 19 in January, she needs to get out and do her own thing... but what am I supposed to do with my son??? Quit my job and go on welfare?? I think not... I have way too much pride to accept any kind of "outside" help.... But there is no one to watch him, the school is convinced that a big part of the problem is his dad and sister are with him too much and I, as his mother, am working too much... but are they going to pay my electric??? Not a chance... I just don't see any resolution to this problem....
I just don't know what to do...

Little more info....

In reply to the remarks from the last post.... I myself will find it interesting to see how it works out...lol
It will be Nov. 1st before Jeff comes back this way, but Paul and I are hoping to get together Wed. or Thur. of this week... his wife works out of town, depends on when she leaves... Thursday is his birthday,(he's turning 50! My ex says I'm looking for a "father-figure"...lol) I hope I can see him then, after two years of not seeing him, boy do I have a present for him....lol
Paul and his wife have 5 kids... the youngest is 16 or 17... and they all know exactly who I am (as does his wife, who is a frigid, pinched-face bitch who thinks sex is only for having children)...lol... and do I get some really nasty looks whenever I run into one of them, which, luckily, is not very often...
I am so crazy about him though, it is worth it... Although in a relationship with a married man it isn't wise, I fell in love with him a long time ago...
I don't know where things are going with Jeff... he told me that divorce is a possibility in his case... but not until their youngest one is older... I don't know that I would ever want to get married again... while I have had affairs with married men, I have never cheated on anyone that I was in a monogamous relationship with, and I don't think I could ever do without Paul... I have missed him like crazy the past two years.....

Total control.....

I have sooo remembered why I like seeing a married man.....
Last night I went to work at midnight, thinking I was getting off work at 8 am. Someone called in, (Erika, again) and I end up staying until noon...
Anyway, Jeff came to town, and brought me a rose, and took me out to eat lunch, and we spent a couple hours out walking in the country... It was a beautiful fall day, and the leaves were beautiful....
He is soo romantic, and sweet...

Then, Paul, the married man I had dated several years ago called me this evening, (still have had no sleep) and says he is going through town, would I like to ride around a little bit and talk? I had forgotten what wonderful hugs he gives... He is 6'4", and has about a 6 or 7 foot wingspan,....LOL...

Anyway, Jeff is a romantic friend, and Paul is a kink-loving lover, and I don't have to worry about picking up after either of them, they don't get involved in how I raise me kids, I don't have either of them falling asleep in my recliner in front of my television while I'm slaving away washing dishes... It's like perpetual dating, I only get the good stuff... Paul and I were together the first time for almost 3 years, and it never got old, it never got run-of-the-mill...

I don't need a man telling me I can't go out with my friends. I spend so much time and energy on my kids and my job, I don't have time for a full time relationship.... But these two together might be interesting.... Stay tuned...

Question for my readers....

There is a man who comes in several times a week, and has for several months. He lives about 4 hours away from the city where he works (he's a physician's assistant) and drives through Hick County to get there. He is extremely intelligent, (which is the #1 thing I look for in a man) and funny, and very nice. We have become friends, talking about music, literature, politics, travel...and today he gave me a surprise. Jeff came in this morning, and I was really busy, he just handed me a note, with a smile, and wandered away...
The note said that he found me extremely attractive, and that he was interested in getting together and getting to know each other better... if I was interested, to simply hand him back the note - with a big smile... if not, to tear it up where he could see me, and that would be that....
Catch is, he is married. Very unhappily, I might add, but married just the same. My question is: Is is worth it to get involved with a married man, when I think he and I may be extremely compatible, or am I setting myself up for disaster??
Please, everyone who reads this, give me your opinion! I had an affair with a married man once before, and it was really great, and we are still friends (he having just recently contacted me again... see previous two or three posts) but is it wise to start another relationship like this?? Give me your opinion! I realize that it is my decision, but I would like to hear others' input...

PS In case you are wondering, I DID hand him back the note, intact.....with a smile...

Help!!!

Well it's official... DC is with Erika now... And she knows how attracted to him I was, so it's a bit strained at work... I don't care, I made out the work schedule today and she doesn't have too much free time this week (hehe).

I'm sick to death of all of them... There are no REAL men around here... Just guys who want you to let them come to your house for sex, but never ask you out... I hate guys like that...I HATE MEN IN GENERAL! They play too much with my head, but that's changing... No man is getting close to my head, my heart, or even my body for a long time.... Not unless a real man shows up, which in Hick County is not likely...

I did run into a guy that I dated years ago... He was a 34 year old married wild-ass biker, I was 17 going on 30... He is divorced and living in Jamaica now... White hair, white beard... Looks ANCIENT!!!!! LOL (he's only 54) Seeing him was a surprise, to say the least... But it was nice seeing him again...

Ya'll are going to get so bored with my life that I will have no readers left... HELP!! SEND ME A REAL MAN!!!!! LOL

Rainy days....

Well... Got to work this morning, and the floor wax guys had put all of our stuff out on the sidewalk to wax the floors... Which wouldn't be such a big thing if it wasn't RAINING!!!! I looked like a drowned rat by the time we got it all put back, part of which was ruined by the rain... And it's cold, I hate cold!!!

Not to mention that DC (see previous two entries) showed up this morning, but spent more time talking to Erika (the girl that lost her job this weekend but got it back yesterday) soo... If she's what he wants, he just doesn't know what he's missing...

I really think that I will go back to the person I used to be... Charter member of the She-Woman Man-Hater's Club....LOL Just spend all my time working and with my son like I do now... And to hell with all men...

EXCEPT, if "Mr.S", the married man that showed up in my life again the other day calls... he is harmless, no strings... no demands... no expectations... to hell with THE REST....LOL

Hello from zombie land...

Damn, what a weekend. We had a girl at work refuse to come in on her scheduled hours, so she lost her job. As we were already short handed, that really screwed things up... I went in at 7 am Friday, worked until midnight, went back in at 5:30 am Saturday worked until 1:30 pm, went back at 7 pm and worked until midnight, back in SUnday morning at 5:30 pm, working until 1:30 pm going back in at 7 til midnight... 43 hours in three days... then I worked graveyard last night, but they have had a discussion with the fired girl and she has her job back... thank God... so things might settle down... at least I get my day shift back...

DC, (see previous post), has disappeared... no one has seen him in a week or so... and in a small town like this, he must be gone, or his vehicle would be seen, at least...

The married guy is still in Amarillo, so I can't see him...

My personal life is just boring... which is probably good, since I'm working so much... R still hasn't got out of my house, which makes things at home very strained... sometimes I think I would just like to run away from home....*sigh*... lol